50 for 50: 2010

YEAR: 2010

AGE: Turned 40 on Nov. 6

LOCATION: SLC, Ramona Avenue

CUBS' RECORD: 75-87

SONGS I LIKED: "Howlin' for You" by the Black Keys; "Month of May" by Arcade Fire; "Little Lion Man" by Mumford and Sons; "(If You're Wondering If I Want You To) I Want You To" by Weezer

MOVIES I SAW: "How to Train Your Dragon"; "Toy Story 3"; "Despicable Me"

TV SHOWS I WATCHED: "Friday Night Lights"; "Wipeout"; "30 Rock"; "Damages"

CONCERTS I EXPERIENCED: Michael Franti; Possessed by Paul James

VIDEO GAMES I PLAYED: Lego Star Wars; Guitar Hero World Tour; Mario Kart Wii

This year, as more people used Zoom to work from home, "Zoom" became a verb in the vernacular. Generation Z is increasingly being referred to as "zoomers." And of course, "Zoom" was a classic kids' show in the 1970s, shoes and socks optional.

In 2010, "zoom" took on a different meaning for me, one that I didn't fully realize until a few years later. Essentially, the last decade zoomed by.

The zoom started when Michael was in kindergarten, but really picked up speed when Ben started first grade in 2012. Time started melting into itself. The boys got older, of course, and their growth and the grades they were in during a particular year can be tracked. Everything around that growth, however, is a blur.

What's truly crazy about the zoom is that things that just seemed to recently occurred were actually many years ago. Memories of watching a particular episode of a TV show for the first time that feel like 2018 were actually from 2011. Jazz games, concerts, and movies that seem like yesterday are from before the boys became tweens. Clothes I think are new I've actually been wearing for a decade.

Facebook is partly to blame for this zoom. You can go into your pictures or your timeline and see what you were doing or thinking at any time since you created your account. 

But Facebook is only intensifying the real reason for the zoom: being a parent of kids make it to school. Before the boys hit kindergarten, every day had the potential for adventure. After kindergarten, every day was built around the six hours they were at school. With work, you try to get from one day to the next to the next, to the weekend, and then another week, and so on. Kids in school just exacerbates that.

Time inevitably feels faster as a parent -- we had been warned about that. I just didn't think it would be so fast that it loses all meaning ... and means everything at the same time. The day-to-day stuff seems to blend into the background, while the big moments -- and a whole bunch of random things -- don't feel like they are 10 years old.

As Michael finished kindergarten in 2010, another parent made a video with all the pictures the teacher took of the kids throughout the year. He set it to music, and one of the songs used was "Little James" by Oasis. The song was released in 2000, and Liam Gallagher wrote the song for his stepson. In 2010, it resonated -- the kid in the song would someday grow up but was living in a moment that he was still a kid. When I looked up the song's history, I realized, that kid was probably already a teenager in 2010.

As I watched the kindergarten video that first time (and I remember where I was sitting in the living room when I did), I was a bit sad Michael's wonderful first year of non-preschool was ending. And I was slugged by the revelation that this incredible journey of parenting would end, leaving us to just memories, pictures and videos, stories, and, ugh, Facebook posts

Ben loved "Little James" -- it was his favorite song as a 4-year-old. I can't bring myself to listen to it anymore, the same way I turn off "Forever Young" by Rod Steward when that plays on the radio.

We can tell younger couples that parenting goes fast, but there's no way to adequately explain to them the zoom, when 10 years will fly past and leaving you wondering where the time went. I don't know if the zoom stops after the kids leave -- I hope so, because I don't particularly want the next 30-50 years to go too fast.

Already, nearly more than two months have passed on this school year. Basketball and swim seasons are starting up. I've knocked out 40 posts in this series when I just feel like I started.

Time. Slow. Down. Now.

Please.


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