The strange solstice

Today is the first day of summer, the longest day of the year, and as is my tradition, I am writing from a hillside overlooking the zoo, with a fantastic view of the sunset. A cloudy front had moved through about an hour ago, and I was concerned I would miss the sunset but it's passing at the right moment, and the setting sun is bright and spectacular.

Of all the years I've been blogging on around this day, this might be the weirdest.

The pandemic in progress, coupled with the fury our nation is feeling, has made this anything but a typical summer or year. The things that I normally would reflect on here seem not as urgent.

Yet, this is my last summer solstice before I turn 50. The first year I did this, I was 36 and had two toddlers, and 50 seemed so far off. Thirteen years went by in a blink, and I can't believe that the tradition I started that day has endured, seeming familiar and new every year I write from here, but frightening me that another year has passed.

Two years ago, as I knew 50 was around the corner, I wrote about how it was time to get everything in order for the next decade. Since then, I need to ask: Have I gotten my s--t together?

I don't know.

Some goals still seem far away. I'm not writing near enough; I'm don't feel as healthy and slim as I should be; and I haven't figured out how to totally appreciate every day that flashes by. And my brain is officially fried from the events of the past few months. I'm tired of the world stressing me out, yet I can't find a way to just ignore it.

Other things seem more organized. The house doesn't seem as chaotic and actually somewhat organized. Work is solid -- no chronic complaints. I like to think I'm connecting with the boys still, even as they naturally pull a little away as teenagers (and this is something I should always be striving to improve, no matter how good it seems). I feel young, despite what the mirror occasionally tries to tell me. And, I'm running again ...

So I guess that's where I'm at: in a good place, with room for more progress. I have it good -- I need to remember that, especially with everything that's going to happen as the boys move into adulthood, and with everything that's going on in the world.

The sun has tucked behind Antelope Island. Another solstice sunset in the books.

This year, for I think the first time, I brought a blanket with me to sit on in Donner Park. In the past, I just sat on the grass and hoped no bugs crawled up my shorts. Maybe I am getting wiser ...

And perhaps that is what the next year has in store for me -- wisdom. I think the incredible sunset would agree.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Summer, Day 8

Today was Memorial Day, and as far as Memorial Days go, this one seemed somewhat anticlimactic. The sun came out after three less-than-stellar days, perhaps preventing the weekend from being a total bust. I worked late last night but was awake earlier than I wanted to be this morning. I fell back asleep and woke up around 10:30 to a thumping sound outside. Michael, Lori and my father-in-law got the rest of the sand in the base of the new basketball hoop, and Michael and his friend from across the street were shooting around. This was Lori's parents' last day in Utah, so we treated them to The Cheesecake Factory at the new City Creek mall downtown. I had the macaroni and cheese burger and most of a piece of Oreo cheesecake (no matter how much I pushed on my sons -- they wanted to share Lori's banana cream cheesecake). The boys and I wandered City Creek a little and came home. The afternoon wasn't much more eventful. Michael and I took Popcorn to the park for about
Read more

Vacation finale

Image
As expected, the last three days of vacation were much less eventful than the first 12. This happens every year -- we get back from Wisconsin for at least one day before leaving for Utah, and it's just wind-down time. And that's OK -- going nonstop for two weeks isn't easy, especially with kids. And vacation is supposed to be a time to relax, and for the past three days, that's what we did. The past few days weren't that relaxing, however. Monday, we met my mom, who is in Chicago this week, for lunch and then to Old Orchard Mall. That night, we met some friends at the new Superdawg (my favorite Chicago hot dog restaurant) in Wheeling. Tuesday, after pondering going downtown, we ended up just seeing the Smurfs movie with my dad. Last night, we went to dinner at a nice little Italian restaurant here in Edgebrook. Wednesday was mostly devoted to getting ready for our return trip Thursday morning. The heat and thunderstorms finally subsided -- this might have been the m
Read more

The Little Red Machine

Image
After blogging about Eldest's baseball experience (as well as mine as an assistant coach), I decided to write about my five years playing organized baseball as a kid. Long ago (the mid-1990s), I wrote about two of these seasons, so I will dig those up and transcribe/edit/add/revise when I post on those two seasons. This post will be about my first season, in 1978 on the Reds. We had moved into our new house in 1977, and my new friends, especially Marc, loved baseball and collected baseball cards. Even before we had moved that spring, I was started to become interested in baseball, so my interest exploded that summer. I had played basketball for two seasons at Norwood Park, so my father signed me up for t-ball in the spring of 1978 and bought me a glove (mass-autographed by Mickey Rivers!). I was placed on the Reds. The team was coached by a couple teenagers, including the older brother of one of my teammates. I don't remember many of my other teammates, except we had a bi
Read more